Honest Curiosity

So I’ve been thinking a lot about my place in activism, especially after a zine I just read. I’ve been doing a bunch of reading with FWD and talking with people at Carleton about educating others and I’ve come to the conclusion that while I’m always going to be educating others, I don’t feel it is my responsibility. This has led me to think about what I’ll call “honest curiosity;” when someone sends me an e-mail or asks me a question that is prefaced with “I’m not trying to be patronizing, I’m honestly curious.” It reminds me a lot of trans issues, which is also something I haven’t written about yet, so I thought I’d start there, then finish with my own thoughts.

For an introduction to gender terminology, see this website. It’s also FWD.

I will add one paragraph: One major reason for the marginalization of trans people is cissexual privilege. This privilege, defined as the double standard that promotes the idea that transsexual genders are different from, and less legitimate than, cissexual genders, is the result of how gendering works in our society. Gendering, the process of distinguishing between males and females, is usually based on secondary sex characteristics, as well as gender expression and behavior. Most cissexuals have never been misgendered, so they are lead to believe that the process of gendering is a matter of observation, as opposed to speculation. Additionally, the idea of gender entitlement depicts gender as a birthright, so transsexuals are cast as people trying to claim for themselves a gender that they are not entitled to.

Cissexual privilege and modes of sexism seek to “normalize” people and thus many practices observed in society marginalize trans people. This happens in a lot of ways. Trans-exclusion occurs when cissexuals exclude transsexuals’ self-identified gender designation; Trans-objectification occurs when cissexuals “become hung up on, disturbed by, or obsessed over supposed discrepancies that exist between a transsexual’s physical sex and identified gender”. This can be seen when looking at how transitions dominate cissexual discourse regarding transsexuality. The focus on physical transformations traps transsexuals in their assigned sex and often manifests itself specifically in a focus on the trans person’s genitals. By focusing on transformations, the trans person’s identified sex becomes a goal they are always approaching but never achieve. Objectification reduces transsexuals to the status of a thing, allowing cissexuals to demonize, fetishize, and exploit them without remorse. Another practice is that of trans-mystification, to allow oneself to become so caught up in the taboo nature of “sex changes” that one loses sight of transsexuality’s tangibility and real-ness. This is seen readily in the media, where the transsexual’s assigned sex is transformed into a hidden secret or plot twist and their lived sex distorted into an illusion. Yet another marginalizing practice is that of trans-interrogation; this is the intellectualization of objectifying transsexuals. It revolves around the question: “why do transsexuals exist?” where a seemingly harmless question is “not a matter of pure curiosity, but rather an act of nonacceptance”. Trans-erasure explains the ease with which transsexual voices are dismissed or ignored by the public. Several reasons cause this: that oppositional sexism restricts the number of people who come out as transsexual, that those who do come out are limited by gatekeepers as they physically transition, and the world assumes people are either male or female and cisgendered and cissexual, erasing from public awareness trans people. This allows the media to depict trans people however they want, academics to posit whatever theories they want, and for cissexuals to claim expert knowledge of transsexuals. Lastly, Trans-fascimilation, the portrayal of transsexual genders as facsimiles of cissexual genders, serves to artificialize transsexual genders.

To summarize the points that are pertinent to where I want to go from here, I will focus on trans-interrogation and trans-objectification. In trans-interrogation, seemingly harmless questions can cause worlds of pain as they unwittingly are deemed to seek answers in an unaccepting manner. Examples of how pissed off trans people get when asked these questions can be found here. Pointing to trans-objectification, questions can imply the conceptualization of the trans person as “other,” such that they cease to become a person, but continue as an object to be studied. Thus, the benign question of “how can you think that?” can be an isolating question stemming from the fixation on the “otherness” of an identity, attitude, or belief.

I feel like this marginalization is not unique to trans people, although I feel it certainly does apply. But people can be marginalized for all kinds of reasons, as we know, and political beliefs can be one of those reasons. I find it demeaning and isolating to be asked how I could think something, or to be told my views are “fascinating because they are so different from [mine].” I am of course open to questions about what I think, but I expect the questions to be thoughtful and self-conscious. I have perfectly valid reasons for why I think things, as I have come to think them through the experiences I have accrued over my lifetime. I think (but could be wrong) others have come to their beliefs through these same methods.

I wish that people, instead of telling me my beliefs are “fascinating” would think about why I might have those beliefs, or at the very least tell me what is so fascinating about them, other than that they’re different *gasp*. I wish people would ask for resources they could turn to learn more about the issues I am passionate about instead of relying on me to supply answers. I would appreciate if people would think outside of themselves before coming to me with questions, though of course basing their statements on their experiences. Clarifying questions are great. I am a human being and my opinions reflect that; I am not an object.

“I realized it wasn’t so important if I figured out someone’s identity if I was just having a chat with them in a line or some such. If I don’t need to know, I don’t need to know. Someone else’s comfort is more important than the satisfaction of my curiosity” (quote courtesy of FWD)

Also, I realize that trans terminology can be hard to understand sometimes, so I’m totally down with answering, as best I can, respectful questions on this topic.

Also also, I’m going to post a review of the zine I just read soon because it was packed full of awesome sauce.